No Elf on This Shelf

I wasn’t going to join in on this whole Elf on the Shelf craze. I just wasn’t going to write about it. But here I am. The bandwagon rode by and I jumped. I’ve read the blogs. Some friends and I have talked about it. And if anything, my decision has been made that much stronger: I will not be buying one of those elves.

When some gal named Jen wrote about overachieving Elf on the Shelf moms on her blog (read here if you missed it), she got a lot of attention. People got mad at her. But some of the moms I know totally agreed with her. And they have the elf.

Real-deal vintage. No fuss, no mess.

You’re supposed to move the elf around at night when your kids are sleeping so they’ll think the elf went back to the North Pole to report to Santa and returned to a different post in your house. Simple. Some make their elf leave notes or move things, hang from the ceiling fan. It becomes a lot to keep up with every day and I don’t have the time or creativity to keep up with it at this time of year. It’s cute but it’s too much right now. Isn’t shopping, wrapping, baking, and partying enough to squeeze into an overloaded schedule? Evidently some people have taken it a bit far with elf behavior. Aren’t the kids supposed to be the naughty ones?

I told a friend I’m not getting an elf and I hoped my kids didn’t see the one at her house. “Oh, you’re getting an elf, Karen.”

No, I’m not.

Here’s why. I already have two elves who leave a mess everywhere and don’t clean it up. Legos multiply overnight. A flashcard rug covers my living room. (Setting the standard for the next big decorating craze.) And cars nearly send me spinning at the bottom of the stairs. I don’t think any of that is cute and fun. I also already have two elves who report to me when either child is naughty. As leader of this workshop, I don’t find that charming either.

The thing that sealed the deal on this no elf thing? As my third-grade son pointed out to his believing sister, “They’re not real. You can’t buy a person for fifteen dollars.” I just can’t argue with that.



Filed under Everyday Life

14 responses to “No Elf on This Shelf

  1. That’s one wise third-grader you have! Makes perfect sense to me, too.

  2. Kim E.

    I haven’t caved in to this elf thing either. My almost 11-year-old is begging me to get one. It’s so worth the money she says. She already has a small collection of “regular” elves. Why does she need more and one that moves each day? What if I forget to move the thing? If I really thought it would make the kids behave, I would get one. Something tells me they would still drive me crazy.

    • EllaTheAwesome

      I feel like this whole “Santa Claus” and “elf” garbage destroyed the meaning of Christmas. December 25 is supposed to be the birth of Christ, not a day to inflate ego and greed.

  3. I first heard about this Elf on the Shelf thing last year when it was too late to get one. I thought it was a cute idea but also just another thing to add to my list of things to do this time of year. We didn’t get around to getting one this year either and I think I am just fine with that. 🙂

  4. mommysaidaswearword

    hahaha, can’t buy a person for $15. That is the best!!1 I’m a non-elfing mom too.

  5. jeep4jeep

    Bah Humbug. I have an elf and my kids love it. Thank you very much.

    • Yeah, but I bet you’re not as zany as some people with it. I could just see myself going to all this trouble to surprise the kids and my son saying, “Yeah right.” I can never fool him!

      • Lisa

        No I don’t go crazy like some pictures I’ve seen. The girls just like to look for it every morning. I’ve only forgotten to move it once and luckily it was on Sunday so I told them it was the elf’s day of rest – like God. Luckily they don’t remember that he moved the next Sunday. 🙂

      • Throw a tissue on him and tell them he’s sick. That would give you a few days!

  6. I’m with you. Isn’t it bad enough that you have to be Santa one night a year, now you have to be an elf for most of December? People in marketing need to make it EASIER on moms, we need a real Santa!

    Merry Christmas!

  7. Betsy

    He is hilarious! What a funny comment!

  8. Pingback: Taking Care of Business | Mom in the Muddle

  9. You’re spot on! I have the Elf. The elf is cute, but it is one more thing to do during an already over-the-top holiday season. My Elf arrives a week before Christmas and some nights he forgets to head back to the North Pole. I think he’s as exhausted as I am most nights. And, between you and me…I think he drinks a bit.
    Seriously, you are a smart woman to know your limitations and it sounds like your kiddos are as smart as their mamma. Great post!

  10. Bah humbug 😦 It’s not work – it’s fun for the kids and that’s why a whole lot of parents do it!

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